I get so unbelievably frustrated with people.
I don't understand people. I just don't.
and basically what I don't get is how they can be so
mean and rude. Like it's some disease to them that just
fills them up, never letting it escape them.

I feel sorry for them in a way. But why should I.
I don't deserve their rudeness, their insincerity.
I should just move on. But it's so hard, it eats away
at me from time to time. Bringing old things up that hurt.
That should just go away and never come back.
Things that shouldn't be said or done.

The phrase were all human comes to mind.
But sometimes being human isn't an excuse.
You have no right of passage to be unjust in a way that
makes others feel as badly as I feel.

I'll be leaving soon, and I'll be happy to have left you.

"Being tender and open is beautiful. As a woman, I feel continually shhh’ed. Too sensitive. Too mushy. Too wishy washy. Blah blah. Don’t let someone steal your tenderness. Don’t allow the coldness and fear of others to tarnish your perfectly vulnerable beating heart. Nothing is more powerful than allowing yourself to truly be affected by things. Whether it’s a song, a stranger, a mountain, a rain drop, a tea kettle, an article, a sentence, a footstep, feel it all – look around you. All of this is for you. Take it and have gratitude. Give it and feel love."

-Zooey Deschanel

Always adjust those sails.

Hmph.

It's just one of those things...

I hope I can become happier soon.

because I'm not really..

right now.

*smileyface

Oh dear lord...
I'm so excited for what is to come. I seriously could freak out right now.
It's a little ridiculous.
This summer shall be one of the best summers ever. EVER.
I just cannot wait. But right now I'm not telling why.
It's a big secret. a REAL big secret. tehe.
I don't feel like telling anyone.. any only a few select people know.
So for right now you'll just have to wait patiently for me to tell you.

EEEEK!

Decisions....

I'm excited.

Lately I've been trying to decide what I want to do after I'm done with school here in Eugene, and I've decided I want to move. Not far away or anything (calm down mom and dad) haha. I just want to move to Portland, I just feel as though everything is there for me, modeling, school, a new adventure and scene than Eugene has to offer. I think I've decided to go this coming fall, and move up during the end of summer most likely. Hopefully I get accepted, because this is my plan, and I hope it works! Alt plan would be to go to OSU... butttt I don't really want to go there, its boring...and small.. and I can't transfer jobs. Which is lame. So going to open house at the Art Institute and apply and get accepted (hopefully) hehe.

Wish me luck!

snowsnowsnow.

Good times.